Giving back through a bequest—BZ Meyers
Reflecting on the death of her mother, BZ Meyers stated, “If dying can be described as beautiful, my mom’s death was as close to that as you can get.” BZ went on to explain that it was the “incredible experience” her family had with hospice in her mother’s last weeks that prompted her to name Midwest CareCenter in her will so that others can benefit in the future.
Compassion overcomes reluctance
Suzanne (Zanne) Meyers died in 2008 at the age of 85. She had been a very active senior, enjoying a variety of activities such as the Comedy and Jazz clubs at the North Shore Senior Center, where she also was a master weaver. A diagnosis of lung cancer, though, slowed her down. As the disease progressed and no treatment options seemed appropriate, her internist referred the family to Midwest CareCenter for hospice care. Zanne mostly listened during the hospice admission and assessment process, but she gradually opened up and became more communicative with her hospice team. For example, her hospice chaplain wisely “came just to chat,” noted BZ. “Mom was a great talker. … How can you resist someone you enjoy talking to?”
BZ, her brother Ernie and sister Marge Graham, who was Zanne’s primary caregiver, saw their mother’s initial reluctance to be cared for by others transform into a gracious acceptance of the kindness and competence of her hospice team. As her health declined, Zanne increasingly needed help bathing and managing other daily needs. Too proud at first, she eventually developed an easy rapport and a trusting relationship with her certified nurse’s assistant, Helena, calling her “Sweetie,” which is what the family came to call her as well.
The hospice approach
“When Mom began to experience pain, it was scary for the family. Hospice was wonderful with pain management, and the team helped the entire family to be there for Mom and be at our best. Personally, hospice enabled me to have a good experience while Mom died, and this gave me the desire to give back.”
The siblings drew comfort from the team’s focus on helping their mother preserve her independence as long as possible. “Mom’s decline was like a flame that was slowly going out, and services were adjusted depending on need—more intense toward the end. The team’s responses were timely and appropriate.”
“By the end, Mom was ready. She was peaceful and accepting. The whole process was beautifully managed, and Mom did not suffer. It was hospice at its best.” A retired teacher, BZ noted that she has been an advocate for hospice since the days when she studied the process of dying and the importance of healthcare choices while earning a master’s degree in counseling.
“The hospice approach is in line with my values. … And this is a perfect example of how hospice is supposed to work.” “It is amazing that someone who wants to die at home, can. … I want to promote the continuation and growth of hospice so that it flourishes. I’m not able to give large sums of cash, but a bequest makes me feel that I am doing something significant.”
